Menu
Psychology articles
Why divorcees make great partners
Is your relationship past its expiry date?
What does it mean if he keeps photos of his ex?
Is your man in love with you?
Perfume as a seduction tool
Facebook and divorce
How to mend a broken heart
The thin line between love and hate
12 things men think we know
How to deal with a bipolar family member
4 signs that you're too dependent on your partner
Get serious - not serial
Is he more likely to cheat during pregnancy?
Are you a love addict?
Surviving sports fever
EX-cruciating exes
The friends you don't want
The key to a balanced relationship
Does your man have “Peter Pan” syndrome?
Five tips to get out of a relationship rut
Get married, stay married, live longer
Together for love or convenience?
How to be your own best friend
Staying sane when living with family
How to mend a broken heart
Mending your heart after it's been broken can seem like a tough, almost impossible thing to do. Statistics prove, however, that it takes on average two years to finally mend a broken heart... so it can be done!

The following ten points might help you along the way:

1. Allow yourself to cry to relieve your emotions

He's broken your heart and you’re in pain. To survive the first few difficult days, allow yourself to mourn, take off work, sleep all day, sob. Don’t try to be brave – submit to your sadness and feeling of loss. Repeat an affirmation to help you through the pain, such as "This too shall pass" or "I will survive".

2. Take an inventory of the good and bad points of the person who broke your heart

Write down what you really miss and loved about this man, and record his negative traits as well. Write down too how, in your perception, the relationship changed during the time you were with him

3. Ask yourself what he did for you

What kind of positive things did he bring into your life? How did he make you feel on a regular basis? What did he have to offer you? If the pros do not out weigh the cons, then you are probably better off without him anyway.

4. Spend plenty of time with good friends and family

Reach out to a close friend or family member – it helps to share your thoughts and emotions with others. Visit an old friend or go back home to your roots. A change of environment does wonders for the spirit.

5. Take good care of yourself

Exercise releases 'feel-good' endorphins, and rebuilds self esteem. Spoil yourself. Watch a humorous or sad movie – both laughing and crying are healing experiences. Write a journal, or write your ex a letter but don’t mail it. Remove all reminders of him.

6. Remind yourself that there truly ARE other fish in the sea

Important to know is that you can be happy with millions! Furthermore, there will be more people in your town or city with whom you could be happy.

7. Assess the experience

Have you learnt from your experience to make more suitable choices in future? Does the experience make you more empathetic to others who've suffered a hardship?

8. Continue to socialise and exercise

Your heart will mend. Socialize with friends, keep up the exercise, and go out on dates. Part of the healing process is to know that your heart can still flutter over someone.

9. Consult a psychiatrist

If you still experience symptoms of depression, such as lack of appetite, insomnia or too much sleep, low self-esteem, an inability to concentrate, or difficulty in carrying out routine tasks, consider seeing an experienced therapist.

10. Remember that healing is a process that takes time

Expect waves of sadness, anger, guilt or fear – even after you think you are over it. Give your heart time to heal.
Compartmentalize the experience in your memory: "My heart was broken once. It really hurt and I'm glad it's over."
Contact your ex – but only for friendship – since trying to win him back will only set you up for another heartbreak.


Print
How to have a fight-free holiday
How to deal with an obsessed ex lover
Living together before marriage
WIN! with The Bedroom!
She asked ME to marry HER...
How to identify an abusive relationship
Help, I'm afraid to leave my abusive man
When jealousy turns scary
Dealing with a jealous sister-in-law
Make your partner feel special
The tao of relationships
WIN! with Virgin Pleasures!
Relationships: the chemistry myth
When your partner has intimacy issues
The art of letting go
Relationships 101
How to cope with a moody partner
Relationships: cutting the ties
Sexy Ever After
Why is he different around his friends?
Friends like these...
I want kids but my partner doesn't
Relationships: making it work
Relationships: weathering the storms
A 30-something’s take on dating
What we can learn from men
The Ex-Files
How to handle a toxic friend
Menu
How to handle a bragging friend
When your mother-in-law moves in
Frogs or princes?
Are you qualified for a relationship?
At what age should you get married?
Help! He cheated with my best friend
Lies men tell us
10 Signs he’s a keeper
Why married women have affairs
Guy friends: the other kind of boyfriend
Are you involved with a narcissist?
Women's surnames - keep hers? Take his?
Can you have too many friends?
What DO men want?
Helping a friend through cancer
Bonding activities for couples
How to get more help at home...
Help! I think he might be gay
How to help a suicidal friend
Five little white lies we tell men
How to know when it’s time to go
He was abused - will he be abusive too?
I kissed a girl
Should you take an ex back?